Talk:Zombiepedia/@comment-67.205.164.39-20180326191301
All Zombie Café Zombie deaths (reactions) BEGINNER ZOMBIES: The "Weaklings" (beginner players' reactions) Man died. "Nooo..." (lv. 0 player); "K." (lv. 3+ player) Woman died. "K." Senior died. "K." Hipster died. "Nooo..." (lv. 0 player); "K." (lv. 3+ player) Cashier died. "They're free for a reason." Couch Potato died. "But this is just another copy of Man, Woman, Hipster, Cashier, and Senior." *renanimates and starts working* "HEY! Quit daydreaming!" Telemarketer died. "Nooo... but that 'name' sounds cool..." (noob in Zombie Café and in real life); "K." (lv. 4+ player) Teacher died. "Ha!" (player who loathes school); "Has only 3 Atk. Strength, but at least Teachers don’t daydream nor attack as often..." (lv. 3+ player) Accountant died. "K. He’s somewhat similar to the Teacher but he is stronger for some reason..." Yoga Instructor died. "She is the strongest of the free zombies..." Businessman died. "K. You're better off running a business rather than running away in an enemy café raid..." Businesswoman died. "K. She's just the female variant of Businessman." Retiree died. "K. Not meant for raids (nor serving) anyway, but at least has a decent Tip Rating." Veteran died. "B-but, the description says he's tough!" (noob) Teenager died. "But he is fast!" (lv. 0 player); "K." (lv. 3+ player) Underachiever died. "Go back to school!" Private died. "K. Description says 'He's the lowest rank of undead.'" Politician died. "K." Nerd died. "Well, that was fast." *checks stats* "Only 65 Energy and 2 Atk. Strength? Well, I guess Nerds are meant to be weak for a reason..." Mathlete died. "He has 4 Atk. Strength like Man, but 65 Energy like Nerd!" Construction Worker died. "NOOO!!! He's killed like 10 people..." *reaches Level 20* "K. Won't be needing you guys anymore. Y'all fired." Engineer died. "Oh well." (lv. 4+ player); "If they looked at his Focus and Patience stats as well as Player Level Required, there is a reason why he is double the cost of Construction Worker..." (APK miner) Old Hippie died. "K." Cop died. "NOOO!!!" (lv. 5 player); "K. You were good in the single-digit levels." (lv. 10+ player) Farmer died. "Oh, man! I need him. I NEED HIM. For cooking and stuff, that's why!" (lv. 5 player); "K." (lv. 10+ player) Nurse died. "Why??? But she is so good in versatility..." *receives Party Animal from Fallout Poi* "Does this mean I should replace Nurse and fire her? But she's already level 8—whatever." (lv. 5 player) Bookie died. "NOOO!!! You guys let me down! But I can't just fire you all, you are my strongest zombies..." *receives Slimmer Man from Fallout Poi* "Goodbye, my highly leveled-up Bookies..." (lv. 9 player) Centenarian died. "The game literally even tells you that he is weak." Young Male Hippie died. "I use him instead of Man or Teenager, and he has decent tips." *receives Soccer Player from Fallout Poi* "Guess i was wrong, then. You're fired. (lv. 5 player) Young Female Hippie died. "Nooo!" *checks stats* "I can't believe I just spent $1500 on her! Why is she $700 more than the male version, even though they have identical stats? It it 'cuz she's a girl???" (normal lv. 8 player); "Because she comes at higher experience and has higher hidden stats than Young Male Hippie. But she's ultimately useless nonetheless." (APK miner's response to latter) Mummy died. "5 Tip Rating, 120 Energy, 4 Atk. Strength, and only $1000. Slow but not terrible. *sees Skeleton Bride walking by* "Holy sh--. I want her. Bad. Really bad. But she is expensive! That's it, Mummy. You're officially done working for me." (lv. 5 player); "I'm Level 100. Welcome to the game of persistent inequality." (Max level player) Punk died. "NOOO! He's the stronger version of Teenager, and he has 5 Atk. Strength!" (lv. 7 player) Foreman died. "NOOO!!! But he is freaking awesome!!" (lv. 7 player); "He was like the strongest of the cash-costing zombies before Beeline added more zombies." (experienced player) Colonel died. "But he's so much better than Mummy!" *reanimates and starts working* "HEY! Quit daydreaming!" *attacks the customers* "No! Stop that!" Executive died. "Oh, come on! This is an upgraded version of the businesspeople!" Fire Fighter died. "Crap. He is supposed to good like Cop, but better because he does not cost Toxin!!" Corporal died. "BUT HOW??? He's even better than Foreman!!" (lv. 9 player) Surgeon died. "Aw, man. He has high health AND Tip Multiplier, but the rest of his stats are the same as Man and Woman..." CIO died. "NOOO!!! But a near-genius shouldn't be that bad working for my café, right?" Fire Chief died. "I–I can't believe it. He's a freakin' Fire Chief. Which means he is SUPPOSED to be better than Fire Fighter. And I just spent $1800 on him! Grrr... now I want the really good zombies, though they're so hard to get!" Class Clown died. "6 Tip Rating? 90 Energy? He is like the fully upgraded version of Teenager! But... he still died." CEO died. "NOOO!!! 10 Tip Rating??? I have never seen such high stat in a regular, everyday human before! Man, I wanna keep CEO. They're pretty good for only $1500... but still only has 3 Atk. Strength..." *reaches level 30 and reads the entire Zombiepedia* "Whatever. I'll take back what I said previously. You're fired." Has-been died. "Where is your former spirit?!" Benchwarmer died. "His mom says he's still helping my café." Reality Star died. "I have an undead Kim Kardashian clone and I accidently sent her on a raid and of course, died. Eh, I'm firing her regardless because SHE DAYDREAMS WAY TOO MUCH." Veteran Cop died. "He's strong for an elderly." AMATEUR ZOMBIES: The "so-so, not-so-great but not-so-terrible" Zombies (amateur players' reactions) Football Player died. "NOOO!!! I spent 10 Toxin on him. 10 TOXIN!!!" (lv. 3+ player); "He's not that good for 10 Toxin." (lv. 10+ player) Calavera de Catrina died. "Oh, man! But she is good tipper—and why only 3 Atk. Strength?! Just look at her face, she literally wants to murder you." Party Animal died. "Nooo!!! But I just got him from Fallout Poi and I'm Level 5! He's like my best zombie—" *sees Skeleton Groom entering café* "OMG wha??? I WANT HIM NOW." (lv. 5 player) Blankey died. "Oh, come on! Reanimate faster! You're a ghost!!!" Waitress died. "B-but, she has 500 Energy like Blankey!!!" Soccer Player died. "Nooo... he died." *checks stats* "Why only 5 Atk. Strength and 5 Speed? I thought actual soccer players are fast and somewhat strong, but hey, at least this one is a good tipper." *reanimates then gets killed in a raid again (process occurring continuously)* "How many times do you have to keep getting killed?! That's it. I'm firing you. And I have Skeleton Bride." NY Sports Fan died. "Crap." *reads Zombiepedia description* "I'm sure the game developers would be happy..." Goth died. "K. This one's not meant to be strong anyway." Supper Girl died. "Nooo..." *checks stats* "4 Atk. Strength??? But why?" Undertaker died. "Now who's the one getting buried—oh wait, zombies do not get buried..." Cheerleader died. "Whatever. I've got better zombies." Male Hula Dancer died. "Crap. But this one looks special." Surfer died. "Nooo... but he looks freakin' awesome. Plus, he's very expensive and I got him from Fallout Poi for free and I don't think his stats are that bad." *reaches Level 20* "Okay. His stats are pretty lame and isn't meant for raiding." Sergeant died. "Oh, come on! He's 10 Toxin and he's the strongest of the Police Collection! *reaches Level 30* "I've just upgraded my Zombie Staff so I won't be needing you anymore." Boxer died. "Nooo! But this one is so much better than Construction Worker..." The Champ died. "NOOO!!! BUT HOW??? He's called 'The Champ' because he is the most upgraded version of Boxer, yet he STILL died!" Star Player died. "But I thought sportsmen are strong and fast." Witch died. "But she has 8 Atk. Strength." *reaches Level 20* "Now I've realized that 180 Energy is too inadequate for raiding and serving..." Martian Scientist died. "WHAT??! But he is special—he is a FREAKIN' MARTIAN!" *checks stats* "Oh." Green Ninja died. "I don't think Ninjas are meant to be strong..." *checks stats* "But they're SUPPOSED to be fast at least!" East Coast Rap Artist died. "NOOO!!!" He's awesome and he's so strong!!" East Cost DJ died. "He may not be as strong as the rapper version of this guy but at least he's cheaper. (See the correlation??)" West Coast Rap Artist died. "Crap." *checks stats* "Wait. He has the same stats as the East Coast Rap Artist. And why are rappers so strong in the first place? Do they know Kung Fu or something?" Local Hero died. "Crap. Most of my zombies died." *accidently fires Local Hero* "W-wait. Where's my Local Hero?? He costs 10 Toxin and he's literally the strongest of the 'Hipster doppelgangers...'" *reaches Level 30* "Never mind. He's still pretty noobish... he's still a Hipster by blood anyway..." Clown died. "Nooo... I need him for TIPS." Stoogey the Clown died. "Heh-heh. Look at him happily reanimating." Werewolf died. "NOOO! I thought he'd kill everone..." *checks stats* "250 Energy?! 5 Atk. Strength?! Th-that's it for Werewolf? You've got to be kidding!" Martian Doctor died. "Still pretty weak. Now I am desperate for Martian Commander..." Knight in Armor died. "WHY U NO USE SWORD???" Executioner died. "Who's turn was it to die?" Pub Patron died. "Alcohol weakens the soul." Mr. ? died. "Oh, well." Pink Retro Robot died. "But he is strong." *checks stats* "See? He is strong. But why only 250 Energy if he's made of hard material?!" Nosferatu died. "I have this and Slimmer Man, along with a bunch of weaklings..." *reaches Café Level 35* "Why do I keep getting these from Fallout Poi? That's it. I'm firing all of you, including my Level 10 one that died." Celebrity died. "Looks weak, IS weak." Reindeer Man died. "Nooo... how dare they kill him?!" *checks stats* "He has 200 Energy and is $10000 like Calavera de Catrina... but the rest of his stats are pathetic compared to hers!" Marooner died. "Nooo... but I thought pirates were strong..." *checks stats* "Well, I guess not all of them..." Shipmate died. "Slightly better than Marooner, but he is has 4 Atk. Strength!" Supermodel died. "Heh-heh. Should've kept her cool in da Meat Locker!" Movie Star died. "The strongest version of the Celebrity doppelgangers... but still! None of them were meant to be strong in the first place!" Ditzy Mafia Girl died. "Boy, is she ugly!" Beatnik died. "Don't eat my brain after you reanimate!" Mime died. "Can't tell if playing dead or reanimating." Candidate died. "Oh, rats!" *checks stats* "50 TOXIN??? He should NOT be worth 50 Toxin because he only has 250 Energy... and the rest of his stats are just AVERAGE... compare him with The Zombot!" Governor died. "Can't tell if grinning or furiously frowning." Ex-Governor died. "After he reanimates, this Cyborg seeks to rule the public, the parliament, the state, the country, the world, the galaxy, then the universe!" Teenager died. "But she is freakin' EXPENSIVE. $500000 for only 200 Energy, 2 Tip Rating, 10 Speed, and 5 Atk. Strength?? Well, at least she is fast..." *reanimates then immediately starts attacking the customers* "Nooo!!! My rating!!! It went from a 5-star cafe to a 2.5 star—you know what?! You're fired!!" Bingo Enthusiast died. "Nooo... but I need her for COOKING." NOVICE ZOMBIES: The "getting there" Zombies (novice players' reactions) Skeleton Bride died. "NOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!! BUT HOW!?!?!?!?!?!" (lv. 5 player) Skeleton Groom died. "NOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!! He's even stronger than the bride!" Scarecrow died. "NOOOOOO!!!!!! Number of raids: 102, Kills: 405. Now it registered a death!!!" (lv. 7 player) Female Hula Dancer died. "Hmmm..." *checks stats* "Holy sh--. She is strong. She can outwrestle a Wrestler." Martian Soldier died. "B-but, he's like the strongest attacker of all Martians..." Martian Commander died. "But why?" *checks stats* "Only 6 Atk. Strength?!" Sumo Wrestler died. "NOOO... He can't even defeat the chef! But how?!" West Coast DJ died. "Oh, come on! His stats are identical to Sumo Wrestler!" Wizard died. "NOOO!!! But we were SO close!" Mighty King died. "But he is the Mighty King!" *reanimates then starts working* "Hey! Quit daydreaming!" *attacks the customers* "No!! Bad King!" Evil Queen died. "But she has higher attack strength than Mighty King!" Major died. "But he's like 5 Construction Workers in ONE!" Will o' the Wisp died. "But he's literally made of fire!!! He should kill people instantly!!! That is... unless the people in the enemy cafés have water..." Metal Head died. "K." Wrestler died. "But he's stro—wait. I also have Slimmer Man." Undead Skeleton died. "But, where are his muscles???" Fish Head Monster died. "Dead already?!" *checks stats* "Only 400 Energy and 7 Atk. Strength?!?! I thought he was at LEAST 1000..." Dr. Mantis Face died. "But he is STRONG and has every special stat!" Blue Retro Robot died. "Aren't you the strongest of the Retro Robots?" Pure Blood died. "You were so good in Level 10 but now you just keep on dying... and you can't even defeat the raid bosses!" Henchman died. "But your stats indicate to me that you're SUPPOSED to be meant for raids, amirite?!" Army General died. "NOOO!!! But you're the most powerful of the Military..." Polar Bear died. "35 Toxin, +40% Zombie Regen, 800 Energy, 9 Atk. Strength, but not-so-good serving stats. This one's definitely meant for raids... It's unBEARable that he died in a raid!" Viking died. "Thanks a lot Fallout Poi... He's not a very good server and he can't even defeat the basic raid boss chef!" Gingerbread Man died. "COME ON! Don't let the people eat you!" Impersonator died. "But he has 700 Energy." *checks stats* "Oh. But he only has 5 Atk. Strength... and good Speed and Tip Rating... no more raids for you." Cowboy died. "Darn. I thought he was good." *checks stats* "Not exactly." Steam Punk Professor died. "Nooo... but still, why does he cost the same as Cowboy even though Steam Punk Professor literally has better stats?" Steam Punk Lord died. "The weaker version of the Steam Punk Professor... there's a reason why one costs cash and the other costs Toxin." Female Captain died. "Well, I thought they were strong 'till now..." Conquistador died. "Nooo... don't worry! My other zombies will take over!" Starlet died. "Not meant for raids, but is meant for serving due to her beauty." Hansel died. "Aw... he looks so cute while reanimating! <3" (fangirl reaction) Mikazuna died. "Nooo... upgraded Sumo Wrestler died..." Yokozuna died. "Why can't the devs change his energy to 1000??" Vampire Bride died. "Nooo! She is strong." Break-fast died. "But how?! He died so quickly and he hardly killed anyone... He's a superhero, amirite?" *checks stats* "Because they made him a fast, high-tipper with Cook XP, they diminished his Atk. Strength and Energy..." Shadow Skull died. "NOOO!!!!!!! Shadow Skull!!!!!!!!" Bastet died. "Just another cash-costing 450 Energy zombie." Horus died. "OH, COME ON! THE RAID BOSS LITERALLY HAD 1 HP LEFT!!" The Pharoah died. "He died... BECAUSE THE OTHER ZOMBIES WEREN'T HELPING HIM!!! >:-(" Gretel died. "Why is she stronger than Hansel?" Magician died. "Crap. Forgot to throw him in the Meat Locker." White Rabbit died. "Oh, come on! He can barely attack!" *checks stats* "Well, wasn't I right about that?" Brown Ninja died. "Grrr... we were so close. But you HAD to die!" Boat Captain died. "But the last time I checked his stats, he was pretty good. I thought he is strong, that's why I let him join raids. Plus he's got Popeye spirit!" Red Guard died. "B-but, his raid stats are like his highest attributes!" Black Guard died. "Downgraded cash-costing version of the Red Guard." Blue Ninja died. "Nooo!!! He was doing pretty well until now..." *checks stats* "He's just a copy of Martian Soldier, who is ALSO blue, but decent regardless." Red Ninja died. "Crap. Reminds me of the Brown Ninja..." *checks stats* "Just another zombie whose stats are copied..." Godfather died. "Nooo! *checks stats* "Atk. Strength is lower than expected..." Eliot Ness died. "You can do better than that!" *checks stats* "Well, you shouldn't just have stood there! You have Construction Worker Atk. Strength..." House Candidate died. "Nooo—oh, right. You're inadequate in raids." Helen of Troy died. "Oh my Goddess! Helen of Troy died!" Minotaur died. "NOOO!!!! I THOUGHT HE'S POWERFUL... :(" Mr. Nukes died. "Again?? That's the second time he's died." Magma Man died. "Yup. The only one that died out of my entire staff..." Cuttle Girl died. "Oh, carps." Fantasy Sports Enthusiast died. "He's surprisingly powerful..." Black Knight died. "BUT HE'S RARE AND AWESOME!!!" Gold Retro Robot died. "WHY DOES HE HAVE TO BE WEAKER THAN THE BLUE RETRO ROBOT?!" FINAL TIER ZOMBIES: The "actually decent without a doubt" Zombies (advanced players' reactions) Jack'O died. "BUT HE WAS LITERALLY ABOUT TO DIE! THE RAID BOSS!" Dragon died. "B-BUT, HE'S LITERALLY A FREAKING DRAGON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Greaser died. "Dude, this guy was BEAST until now..." Slimmer Man died. "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Headless Horseman died. "B-B-B-B-B-B-BUT-BUT... HOWWW!?!?!?!?!?!" Elf Archer died. "BUT HE'S SOOO GOOD!! ALL HIS STATS ARE GREAT!!!" Rouge died. "NO FAIR!!! IT WAS 5 DRAGONS AGAINST 1 ROUGE!!!" Undead Skeleton Pirate died. "YARRR!! YE LET ME DOWN!!!" Valkyrie died. "NO FAIR!!! SHE DOES NOT EVEN HAVE 1000 BASE ENERGY!!!" Vampire Hunter died. "NOOO!!!" *checks stats* "JUST 850?!?!" Anubis died. "I THOUGHT THEY WERE STRONG IN THE PYRAMIX!!!" Cleopatra died. "BUT SHE IS EVEN BETTER THAN ANUBIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Alice died. "WHY WAS NO ONE HELPING HER?!?!?!?!?" Thor died. "HE'S GOT 12 ATK. STRENGTH!!! THAT'S THE HIGHEST!!!" Loki died. "OH, MAN!! BUT THE GOD OF EVIL IS SUPPOSED TO BE STRONG!" Orc Warrior died. "I THOUGHT HE WAS GONNA MAKE IT ALONE!!!!" Biker died. "HE'S AS STRONG AS SLIMMER MAN!!!!!!!!!!!" Vampire Ghoul died. "WHY YOU!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!" Dr. Hoboken died. "BUT HOW!?!? HE'S DR. MANHATTAN!!!" Galaticus died. "He will seek revenge on the raid boss that killed him..." Draculette died. "NOOOOOOO... Well, at least she regenerates quickly..." Prince Vlad died. "BUT HE'S THE BEST VAMPIRE ZOMBIE IN THE GAME!!!" Darklord died. "$&*€¥$#$@&*#$@$#&@*$#$&@!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! X-(" Huntsman died. "ARE YOU KIDDING ME!?!?!?!?!?!" Little Red died. "I THOUGHT I TRANSFORMED HER!!!" Granny Wolf died. "Oops. Forgot to transform him..." Zombie Man died. "WHAT?!?!" *checks stats* "BUT HE'S A SUPERHERO!" Queen of Hearts died. "Raid boss, your head will soon be devoured!" Mad Hatter died. "GOT KILLED MY HIS OWN SPECIES!? CANNIBALS!!!" Thunder Woman died. "BUT I NEED HER!!! SHE'S THE FASTEST ZOMBIE..." Amazing Amazon died. "Crap..." *checks stats* "BUT HOW WAS THAT POSSIBLE?!" Iron Steel died. "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!! NOW HE HAS 1 DEATH... :(" Mafia Goon died. "I–I can't even... WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED!?!?!?" Al Capone died. "THIS DOESN'T MAKE LOGICAL SENSE!!!!!!!!!!!" Politician died. "NOOO!!! My Barack Obama clone died. YOU LET ME DOWN!" Senator died. "Well, I'm surprised that she has already defeated 5 enemy raid cafés ALONE." *checks stats* "O.M.G. She's literally the strongest zombie..." Presidential Candidate died. "Wow! Hillary Clinton's sure is strong, though." Cyclop died. "DAMN IT! HE CANNOT BEAT ALPHA OMEGA ALONE!" Medusa died. "B-but, she's at a high level..." Super Templar died. "How could a zombie so strong die like this?!" The Zombot died. "B-B-BUT... IT WAS MULTIPLE AGAINST ONE!!!" Victorian Butler died. "THAT WAS LITERALLY IMPOSSIBLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Lady of the Manor died. "STUPID DRAGONS! STUPID QUEENS!"" Sleuth died. "THERE WAS NO WAY THAT HAPPENED!!!" Her Royal Highness died. "They killed Queen Victoria... HOW SHAMEFUL." Street Urchin died. "He has 1250 Energy!!!" *checks stats* "6 Atk. Strength?!" Victorian Maid died. "Nooo... You've lived a good life..." Commando died. "WHAT. THE." Colonal Marine died. "You kill her this life, she kills you next life." Secret Service died. "HOW DARE THEY KILL MY SECRET SERVICE???" Archaeologist died. "Gee. That was one hell of a raid." Riot Girl died. "This time she may be a wreck. Next time, you will be a wreck." Rock God died. "Do they know who they are killing? It's freaking Ozzy!" Guitar Hero died. "THAT'S ZOMBIE HENDRIX TO YOU!!!" Pop Diva died. "The raid system seriously needs improvement..."